From anonymous, newly-minted lawyers:
Did anyone hear about the prestigious litigator who was so out-of-tune with modern technology that when he heard someone — referring to use of an old motion as a template for work they were doing for him — use the term “cut and paste”, he thought they intended to print both documents, then physically cut with scissors portions of one and paste it over portions of the other. Naturally he gave the young associate a good stern talking-to about such blatant waste of time and firm resources (like, apparently, gluesticks). Rumor has it this in fact occurred in the past 5 years. Rumor also has it that I currently work for the partner.
It’s an esteemed profession we’ve chosen friends.
the managing partner for the firm I worked for - former president of the state bar - to this day does not have a computer. At all. His secretary prints out any email that he receives and places them in a tray outside his door. Then he dictates replies. Sweet.
"This is Mr. <Prosecutor>'s secretary. He dictated this email and asked me to send it to y'all because he is out personally investigating a prostitution bust at Fantasy World."
I get in trouble on a daily basis because I don’t dictate everything. Other than giving the secretary types busy work and allowing me to bill for the invariable corrections required, I’m not sure what purpose it serves. Even if I did dictate stuff, I’m not sure who’d I’d give it to. No one has assigned me a secretary yet, and at this point I’m afraid to ask.
In fact, judging from some of the work I’m doing, I might be a secretary . . .
One of the partners was in North Carolina for two weeks and needed something mailed back to the office. He called his secretary and had her mail a stamped envelope from our office in Georgia to North Carolina.
